This process of untangling myself from you

I'm quieter now, more calm. I'm a little less manic and I really think I'm kinder. I've been curbing myself, and it's nice to see some change. I have a really great job offer for September, and I'm moving out of the state. I'm finally going somewhere warm and close to the ocean, so you should be proud. My life is still funny without you in it, you would think I'd be used to it now but I'm not. I'm an all or nothing girl when it comes to my heart, and when interesting, quirky things happen to me during the day I file them away in my mind to tell you. I really hope that someday we can be friends again. I miss you, a lot. And not even the being in love part, just the part where we got to talk and express that we cared for each other instead of pretending not to care, yet knowing that we still do. And maybe it's stupid to use this blog to communicate, but you changed the landscape of my heart and soul, and I need to have some connection to you, however public and technical it may be. I hope you're happy, but I still hope you feel just a little hint of sadness when you think of me. We'll call it a courtesy, and we don't have to tell anyone.